Things I would tell my 15 year old self

If you could, would you speak to your past self? What would you say? I feel like I could make growing up a lot easier. I know that I would've have really listened to any advice offered but then if it was coming from me then perhaps I would've trusted myself.  I find this quite difficult to think about since I know so much now that would've been helpful back then, it's hard to think of specific things. Some things you need to learn yourself instead of someone telling you to do something, but then there are a few things that I think I would've liked to have known. There are the obvious things like, eyebrows (which I feel like everyone would say to their teenage self) but I'm not going to go into that, eyebrows deserve there own blog post.  It's been 5 years since I was 15. I wouldn't say I know everything, I certainly do not, but in these past five years I have learnt a few things...

ONE

      Girls are bitchy but that doesn't mean you have to be too...

I don't think I was ever bad. I would never do anything to intentionally hurt someone, I would feel too bad. I had been mostly the brunt of every joke or the target to the mean comments. However, I think that some of the girls I hung around with were awful (and I am glad that I am no longer friends with them) but I walked around with them through the hall ways and was there when they behaved so bitchy to other people and because of that I was a bitch from association. When I finally dropped them and went to sixth form, people were actually surprised of how nice I actually was, which meant the must have thought differently before.

TWO
People don't mean what they say, even if they do, don't let that ruin your day.
Teenage boys are the worst, one boys opinion and they follow like sheep. I used to let their comments pull me down all the time, their comments were awful but it was just one person's thoughts repeated in all of their mouths. I wish someone told me that then, for them it's just a joke and obviously my reactions were the most satisfying to them so they carried on doing and saying things. Boys can be clueless sometimes, they don't think about the impact that their words can have on people.

THREE
Just because everyone else is doing it, doesn't mean you have to. You have plenty of time to be a grown up and you will miss the time you were a teenager so don't waste it and be a teenager while you can. Even with makeup, I feel like it scar' d me for life! I haven't actually worn foundation since I was 15. I have very pale and freckly skin, so it was difficult to find the right product and now I don't even bother because of the embarrassing orange skin I gave myself. I don't want to make that mistake twice.

FOUR
Don't wish it away. I had no worries, If I had the problems that I had when I was 15 then I would be breezing through life easily. I actually miss that time at school, it was so simple and I felt that my life had such a good structure to it, it kept me healthy without even knowing it. I got to see my friends everyday without having jobs and uni getting in the way. Also, 15 was my last year my Brother was living in the house full time before he went to uni. As much as he used to drive me mad, when he was gone I missed it. Your parents can't fill that void. To me, a sibling is an automatic friend (especially because we moved around so much). You can't annoy your parents like you annoy your brother, you just end up with pissed off parents which is never a good thing. They used to take my jokes and banter seriously which would always end up in me getting in trouble.

FIVE
It's so cool to be different. Be smart, Be creative. When I think back now, I think why did I care whatever people thought, really why? I used to play the violin, the guitar and I gave it up. Who knows why, but I feel so stupid now. I wish I still played an instrument, I loved music and if I kept at it I think I could've been really good, and for an adult that is a very interesting trait to have. Why do we get to an age and give up hobbies that we were so passionate about? I wish I could've told myself no, keep going and it will all be worth it. Why did I have to care what people thought?

Finally, SIX
My Mum is my best friend. Who else would do anything for you? I didn't realise this until I moved out but now I wish that I hadn't thrown my teenage strops at her, makes me so sad that I used to take all this stuff out on her. After all that she is still there for me, that's how fab she is. I hope when or if I have a daughter, I want to be as close to her as I am with my Mum. The irony of all this, of this blog post, my Mum would've told me all of this, everything I've written in this post but I didn't listen. So maybe that's my last piece of advice. Listen to your mum!

P.S, Sorry about the quality of the photos. They were taken five years ago, technology and camera quality has very much improved since then, but I hope you enjoy my 15 year old self.